The Pregnant Introvert

So yes, the big news is that, after 2 years of trying, we are finally expecting! At 18 weeks tomorrow, I’m pretty close to halfway through the pregnancy, so I thought now was a good time to blog about my experience so far. (Also, tonight was just the time I had a few minutes and felt motivated to write!)

Being pregnant as an introvert has been interesting. Usually I am not so big on sharing personal things with the general public (while also being fairly open about my personal life, if people ask or it comes up), but in this case I could not wait to share the news! We found out right around 5 weeks, so it was very early. Luckily, we were already planning to see my in-laws the weekend after we found out, so we didn’t have to wait long to tell them. My parents were out of town at the time, though, and since I wanted to tell them in person, that meant waiting until the following Wednesday, I think. It was torture not being able to talk to my mom about what I was going through, especially because at that point I was still really worried and terrified that I was going to lose the baby. It was somewhat irrational, but after all we went through to get pregnant, the idea sent me (literally) into a panic. And since I can’t take my break-through anxiety medication (Xanax) while pregnant, I had to fend off a few panic attacks with other, non-pharmaceutical tools (namely, deep breathing and Star Trek). Of course, if I’d REALLY needed to talk, I’d have called her, but mostly I just wanted to talk about little things.

Once we told the parents, it was still hard to wait until 8 weeks to tell my close friends, 10 weeks to tell my band members (and explain why I was being kind of wussy about the long hours and heat at Fest!), and 12 weeks to tell my coworkers and the general public!! Work was especially difficult, since I was making some urgent trips to the bathroom to throw up. Luckily I only had about 3 weeks of that, and I wasn’t puking every day, so it wasn’t that hard to hide. But I was seriously counting the days until I could make that little announcement! Of course that’s normal– it’s very exciting news– but having to struggle NOT to talk is a bit odd as a very strong introvert! ๐Ÿ˜‰

The next big news, which we didn’t have to wait at all to tell, was that we’re having a boy. ๐Ÿ™‚

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Fest 2013 (Very belated!)

It’s been a very long time since I’ve posted. Life got in in the way. Part of that was Fest. Part of it was finding out I’m (finally!!) pregnant. Part of it was laziness. ๐Ÿ˜‰ I will address the pregnancy in another entry, but this post is about Fest. (I will not dedicate a post to the laziness.)

This year was my 10th year working at Fest. It was also very different. And my best year yet!

It was amazing being part of a small musical group– for the first time I really felt like I had a place I belonged at Fest. My first 5 years at the chocolate cart were fun, but I didn’t really get to know anyone except the other chocolate wenches, which left me no one to hang out with when I was off shift. I met a lot of really nice, cool people when I was a beer wench with the Shakopee Jaycees, but I never really felt like I fit in there, either. And with Terpsichory I had a bit of a community and I really liked (and still like) the other Terps, but being one of the few musicians in a dance troupe, I always felt like I was a bit on the outside. This year, with Hardtack Jack, I was with a small group of people who shared the common interests of music and nautical things. The small group size enabled me to feel comfortable and really get to know the other members of the band during our weekly rehearsals, and especially at our out of town gigs before the Fest season. We are very lucky in that we all get along really well– we even got through the entire Fest season without driving each other crazy! Not that we never get on each other’s nerves, but generally we get along great and (I think) really enjoy each other’s company. I’ve been able to open up to them much more than most other people I know at Fest. I still probably have some opening up to do, but we’ll continue to rehearse in the off season, which means as we continue to grow as a group and learn new material, I can continue getting to know them and letting them get to know me.

Oh yeah, and I sing in public now. Like, in front of people. And solos too– not just as part of a chorus. And I’m perfectly comfortable with it. I’ve been comfy performing on flute for years, but singing is relatively new. ย Surprised a few people, I think. ๐Ÿ˜€